Episode Summary
Yesterday I got struck down and overwhelmed by deep feelings of depression. I thought it might be a relapse but as you’ll hear in this lesson, I even had a productive day yesterday despite how I was feeling.
Episode Transcript (Edited)
Hi and welcome to today’s episode of Hope, Help, Happiness.
In yesterday’s episode, if you’ve listened, you might’ve seen that I asked the question, have I had a relapse? Because yesterday I experienced huge, overwhelming feelings that took me back to a place I thought I’d escaped from.
Because of a variety of reasons, I felt really, really low. I felt despondent and it wasn’t a good day for me.
I recorded that episode at 7:00 PM yesterday after a day that wasn’t a good one emotionally, but it was extremely productive.
I got quite a lot done despite feeling really low feeling really bad about myself. That in itself is encouraging because in the past I would have let those feelings consume me to the point where I wouldn’t have done anything.
When you work from home and there’s no one else around, it’s very easy just to crawl under the Duvet and stay there.
But I didn’t.
I had a really, really good day.
But yesterday did not get off to a good start because I didn’t do my morning routine. However today I got up, I refocused, I did my morning routine and I’ve had a really productive day.
So yesterday I felt and still feel a little bit emotionally bruised because of what I went through.
I’m quite wary about declaring I feel great because I don’t want it to sneak up on me again. But I feel okay now.
Yesterday is a reminder there are demons still lurking under the surface. At any point they can come up and drag me back down to the place that I escaped from earlier on this year.
But I think it’s positive I recovered from yesterday quite quickly and didn’t let myself get dragged down. And I’m coming out of it within 24 hours which is a good sign I suppose.
My question in yesterday’s episode was, have I had a relapse?
And I think the answer is no. I’ve just had a blip.
These blips might happen. No, these blips will happen. I think it’s about developing ways to deal with them.
I mentioned yesterday I know of a technique I could have used that would have interrupted my pattern of negative thought. But as I said yesterday, they don’t work, if I don’t use them and if I don’t feel like using them, I’m not going to use them.
So now that I’ve had that experience, I’ve got to look at preparing myself the future if it happens again.
If it does, what am I going to do? Because if I don’t prepare myself, I’m just going to be overtaken and overwhelmed by those feelings again.
And next time the result might not be quite so positive.
So until tomorrow.
